Weekly Review

Sunday: Lilo sneaked out the gate about 2 p.m. while I was weeding and neither, hummingboyd nor furball nor I could find her. She returned 5 a.m. next morning; I slept fitfully all night, getting up every two hours to check the doors to see if she'd returned, and I must admit, calling her several times. I don't know what her adventure entailed, but she came back with her usually white underbelly and paws wet, brown, and dirty, but none the worse for wear. She was hungry and thirsty and used her litter box right away. Even though she goes outside in the fenced back yard to soak up sunshine on weekends or evenings, she comes inside to use her litter box, so I doubt she pottied the whole time she was gone!!! She can't climb, as she's declawed. I figure she hid some place.

My girlfriend called and said that her brother-in-law (husband of her sister who passed away a month ago) died in a scuba accident on his trip to Hawaii. She was beside herself with grief. She really wants 2008 to be over! I don't blame her at all.

My dad called and said he had made plane reservations to spend THREE weeks at Thanksgiving with us. He says he wants to meet his great grandchildren before he dies. What he'll do to occupy himself during the time he's here, I have no idea, as I have to work, as do CEO.

Monday: I was scheduled to have my second preobservation meeting with the principal. The teacher's union president was not there (Her husband succumbed to cancer) and the other rep was out of town. I didn't want to have the meeting without a rep. As it turned out the principal was too busy to meet with me, so we postponed the meeting till the next day.

My primary paraeducator was ill with pneumonia and was out ALL WEEK! We had a minimum number of kids on Monday, thank goodness!

Tuesday: A teacher's union rep was able to attend my preobservation meeting. When I arrived, I told the principal that the rep was on her way to join our meeting. Principal tried to convince me I didn't need a rep. She said that this was just a simple preobservation meeting (Of course the previous one was the one in which she told me I was so awful and finally reduced me to tears...bullying?) When the rep arrived, she again told the rep and I that the rep didn't need to be there, then proceeded to call the district's assistant superintendent to ask whether the rep was allowed to be there.....well of course she was!!! It was my choice!!!!! Principal didn't like it much...it may come back to bite me sometime. We'll see. The meeting was much more professional and quick.

All but one of the kids were back at school; spacey and unable to function very well Is it a full moon? Have they already been into the Halloween candy? Are they watching scarey movies?

Wednesday: I'd been coming to school at 7:30 (class starts at 8:30) to set up the activities and clean the classroom as my assistant is gone.

One student wanders away as we are getting coats on to go outside. Now I know you think that is just negligence, but remember; I have a substitute assistant who thinks these kids respond to their names and simple commands such as /stand still/, /sit/, /stop/, /walk with me/. Uh, they don't. We find the child wandering down another hall, just before I'd decided to do an 'all call' from the office! Getting these kids ready to go outside is like trying to herd cats. They all need help putting their coats on, try to run down the broad empty hall, wander into nearby classrooms, or cry in their wheelchairs if we aren't getting to them fast enough!

I saw and heard the cedar wax wings eating the small crab apples from trees on the playground. I love those pretty little birds. Thank you, God!

I Rewrote my lesson plan for observation on Thursday as the class's schedule has changed since my assistant is gone. We have been participating with the class next door on their outdoor playtime, so our other activities are shuffled. This is the second lesson plan I've made for this one observation; of course I had to check with the principal to see if it was okay that I re-do the plan.

Thursday: My body is rebelling at the stress and I don't feel good. Observation today. All children were there. We 'washed' our pumpkins in prep for painting them. Kids enjoyed the splashing of the water and some of them even used/touched the rough scrubbers in the soapy water.

One child has a fever and I have to call 3 numbers to find his parent so he can go home. I hope holding him on my lap didn't give me his illness.

The afternoon arrived and the OT and SLP rescheduled to see my kids that afternoon. That's fine except for one child who had a total melt down. You see, I sort of set this up to see what would happen (I had an idea it would go like it did). I bought some little tootsie toy cars for the two boys in class. One boy thinks all the cars are his (typical 2 year old behavior, even though these kids are 4 years old) and when the second child took some, he absolutely fell apart, screaming and crying and tantruming for about 30 minutes. Once he got started, his brain injury kicked in, I think, so that it was even harder for him to calm. The OT and the SLP were trying to work with the other kids.Finally, he calmed enough for us to go outside. Remember, my observation was to begin when we returned from outside play.

At 2:30, the principal came in and said she had an emergency and would be about 15 minutes late (She was 30 minutes late on my 1st observation and didn't let me know, so I wrote that on my postobservation reflection to her). Fifteen minutes later she came back and said she still had to take care of some ER stuff. I said, fine. (I was relieved, actually, and I kept on with the lesson plan I had prepared. Finally at 3:00 p.m. she came in and asked what we should do. She asked if I could repeat the same lesson next week, if we could reschedule the observation for then. I said, sure (thinking, yah, these kids need a month of the same lesson for them to get it!) So my observation is scheduled for next Wednesday afternoon at 2:30. We'll see if that works out.

Mainly, at least I have the principal thinking that she needs to show some respect for my work if she wants it reciprocated. (Or because she knows I've got the teachers' union with me.) Whatever, it is working! And she didn't give me one of her creepy "You're my best friend" hugs! She should ask people if they want hugs or not before she goes spreading them around. Not everyone in the world wants hugs from their bosses!

Friday: 8:00 a.m. team meeting. I'm exhausted and don't feel good. Guts are acting out more as the week progresses. I discover at the meeting that my name is on the calendar (not on the posted one I looked at, but at another one they added to our preschool sped folder) to do an assessment that morning...there goes my time for planning next week's curriculum with my assistant who is finally returning to work. My assistants only work 3 hours on Fridays, as they are only allowed 30 hr work-weeks. It's complicated, but basically they are present only during the time the students are in class.

By noon, I've scored the assessment. I've got a headache and am so tired I can't think. I felt nauseated. Even though we had a special training planned for the afternoon, I gave my apologies and went home. I took a two hour nap and felt better; just relaxed in front of the tv....Ellen is crazy, crazy. Then I visited little O for a short while, as I won't get to see him this weekend as his grandpa( my ex) and his wife will be here at noon to visit. I'm fine with it, as I can just 'cave' for the weekend.


Saturday: Looked out my kitchen window this morning and saw that one of the boards of my NEW fence had been ripped out. Thankfully it was still in good condition, so I called the fence guy and he reinstalled it later today. I think it was kids just being mean. Grrrrr.

Stayed with O at Sabbath school. He is really catching on to participating in the activities. He was tired this morning, so mom took him home and I stayed for church. Bustling church today, as it is college 'family weekend'. Quite a parade! So that's my week. Today was nice, cool fall weather. There are still pretty leaves out, but they are starting to fade. I thought about going for a walk, but slept on the couch instead. :o) Thus I'm up later tonight!

I'd better get to bed. No matter what time I go to bed, it seems I'm still waking at 5 a.m. Arrrggghhh. Getting old is the pits. Don't do it.

Week's Reflection

BRrrrrr. I tried to keep from turning the heat on, but by Tuesday it was into the 40's at night and only into the low 60's during the day, so I turned on the bathroom's heater. Wednesday the nighttime temps dropped into the 30's and only rose into the 50's so on came the living room heater. During the week Lilo had been more and more interested in sitting on me as I rested on the couch in the evenings. Now some would think that she was a very affectionate cat....well,perhaps, but she really was just cold! Now that the heat is on, the 'cuddling' has abated! In the morning I opened the door a crack for Lilo to go out for her morning grass munch and she just stood at the door looking out as though the weather change was a slap in the face to her. She crouched down just inside the door on the rug with her little nose poked out. Well, this didn't set with me, as the incoming air was Cold, so I shut the door. Lilo just walked away, as though she was insulted. Right now she is curled on my chest as I try to sit in my easy chair and write this blog. Purrrrrrrrr.

I'm tired. I had a very busy week at work with extra reports to write. In the evenings I seemed to be going into the hibernating mode, as on two evenings, I was in bed by 7 p.m.

Speaking of work: the Queen of Mean gave me kudos on Friday for having better communication with my colleagues. So what have I consciously done? I smile and say, "I'm fine." to whoever asks. I tried to make small talk with the two people on my team who think I'm nasty. Basically 'kissing butt.' The Queen said that it just takes time to get things in place for the team to run smoothly and perhaps I was ahead of my time. I wished I'd had a tape recorder! Of course she said all this when there were no witnesses.

I do feel better about my job this year, as just being familiar with the environment and the general workings of the place make it easier to function. Of course, I have great assistants who take care of lots of classroom details for me. I've actually been able to plan more curriculum. My mentor finally got a schedule together for us and those meetings are actually productive! Why they didn't do this last year is beyond me! I truly believe I've just been a catalyst for the district to put several things in place that I complained loudly about last year: safety of kids, formatting forms, agenda and notetaking during meetings, making a preschool handbook and calendar for parents,etc.

On the other hand, my prayer through the years is that I would become a kind, thoughtful, gentle older woman, rather than a bitter, cynical one. Perhaps I've become so overly focused on survival that I've lost the ability to just be friendly....which was never easy for me, as I have few friends, but they are honest and true. So maybe I needed this angst in my life to make me take notice and make some internal changes for the better. I look for something good personally to come from it all.

I'm thankful to have a job at this point in our country's history. I'm going to hang in there for awhile and not look for more change for awhile...remember these are my thoughts for THIS week.:o)

My grandbaby's first birthday is this Tuesday and we are having a big family party on Monday evening, as his other grandma, auntie and cousin will be here. It should be fun and the only ache is that ACE cannot be here to share family, too.

I need to get on with my day, but my joy is resting on Sabbath and having my own time on the weekends.

Happy Sabbath!

Portland or Bust

Busted! I had very high hopes of leaving town for a three-day weekend(I even arranged a day off work!),getting dr. appts out of the way, seeing wonderful fall foliage in the Gorge and visiting 'old' friends. Thursday after school, having straightened the house, made my list and prepared my classroom assistants for what to accomplish on Friday, I took my car to get the oil changed. The mechanic informed me (you can see this coming, can't you?) that the water pump was leaking. The water pump is connected to (directly influences..or some such) the timing belt (leg bone connected to the thigh bone). Now I've had enough experience with cars to know that if the water pump is leaking, 'you ain't goin' very far;' and I've had enough experience with Hondas that if the timing belt breaks, you could ruin your engine big time. So, because I really, really, really wanted to get out of town, I debated about chancing the drive to Portland and having my car fixed at my previous garage there; I even checked it out. Same price, no state tax! Then I debated the issue more with my daughter and a friend and decided no, it wasn't wise to chance getting stuck in the Gorge, even if I do have roadside assistance. The first pacific storm of the season was to settle in and rain/wind in the Gorge can be pretty wild.

So, you guessed it. I cancelled my trip, rescheduled my appointments, and took my car in Friday to a local garage to have it fixed. Of course, the money issue made my stomach churn. This month my paycheck did include about $300 from extra training days before school started, but I was still in trouble. I just ask myself, will it ever end? Will I ever be able to handle my finances and not live paycheck to paycheck? Look how old I am and I am still learning this lesson! AAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!!! Thankfully, my dad, who despite his emotional blackmail for monies given, covered my car expense without too much lip.

And these are the kinds of situations that make me crazy that I can't reciprocate to my own children when they need monetary assistance. I do have so much love and want to be there for them when they need me. To my family in TN, I ache because I can't be there to lessen your burdens more!

So here I am. I am glad I didn't drive the Gorge as the rain is heavy and the winds are wild. Lots of thunder and lightning here. Instead of looking for O's BD gift in Portland, I ordered it online; not nearly as much fun, but I think I got a decent price. CBP and I are going to shop in tricities tomorrow to make up for my not being able to go to Portland. (I hate paying state tax on everything I buy, but I really like not having to pay state income tax at the end of the year. I suppose it evens out in the end.)

I rented a movie tonight "August Rush". Its a feel good movie with tears. If you love music and 'happily ever after families', I suggest it. Off to bed.